Ritter Family RV Trip : Time and distance...

Time and distance

That's what friendship is about. Time and distance. I learned this, rather heard about it, back in 1997 or so, when I was a junior in college. I tagged along with my good friend Chris McDougall and his family to Colorado for a ski trip. After skiing during the day Chris, his dad Jack, his Uncle Tom, and I went to to a bar for drinks. After a handful or two of drinks, all Jack and Tom kept telling us was real friendship is created by having time and distance apart from each other. At the time Chris and I were at separate schools. He at Arizona State, and me at Illinois State. I understood a little about what they were saying, being apart from Chris, but still being friends. I also remember thinking, nah, not me, I'm going to have the same friends when I'm their age. Chris and I continue to be the best of friends to this day, and haven't lived in the same city for more than a few of the last 18 or so years.

Which leads me to...

Last Friday night I met up with my friends from high school. We were a really close group and haven't seen each other much in the last few years. I can't remember the last time we all got together. We planned to meet at my friend Nickita's house in Crystal Lake, the town next to the town we grew up in. I planned on driving the RV and sleeping in it in Nick's driveway, but it was turning into more effort than I wanted, so my friend Lenzi picked me up. My sister's house is sort of on his way home, so he picked me up around 3:30 and we went to his house. I haven't seen Lenzi in a few years. When we got in his car and said goodbye to my family, and we picked up right where we left off. Basically we took turns ripping on each other and laughing about old times. Friendship is special isn't it? It was so fun. When you know people almost your whole life there's nothing to hide, even if you could hide it, your friends wouldn't do antything less than demand total honesty. After a 20 miinute car ride of hysterically ripping on each other, we got to his house. He has a beautiful house not more than a mile or so from where we both grew up. He went outside to mow his lawn, while I watched the Cubs game. We finally got ready about 6:00 or so, and left for Nickita's house around 6:30.

Ironically, my buddy Donny lives right next door to Nickita in Crystal Lake. After growing up 10 blocks from each other, I guess they couldn't stand being so far apart. Lenzi and I were the first guys there. Donny was in his backyard talking to a contractor, so we went into Nickita's house. Nickita married this really cool girl from high school that was a few years younger than us. They just had their second child a few weeks ago, so when I walked in Nickita was feeding his two week old daughter Olivia. His wife offered us beers right away, and like the good friends we are, we immediately started ripping on Nickita, and telling old stories about him. His wife is such a trooper, she finished up the feeding with us in the kitchen while we had a beer. Nick's two year old son Trent hung with us the whole time and was fun to be around. Over the next 20 minutes all the guys finally showed up. Bobby came, Nickita went to the train station to pick up Gasi from the city, Gummerson came, and of course Donny, being Donny, didn't meet us until later at the bar. Kelly would make it later after dinner. He had to close up the restaurant his family owns, that he now runs. After a quick walk down memory lane via the senior year book, (pics below) we left.

We started the night out at Duke's. We used to go to Duke's during college and I always remember it being a dumpy beer and burger joint. Now it's all organic and hormone free. They still have beer. Ironically as we've matured Duke's matured right on with us. We had a few beers upstairs while we waited for a table. Donny finally arrived and we started in on him for being late and the usual ribbing we give to each member of the group. We sat outside and had dinner on the patio, and the jokes kept coming. It was a total riot. I hadn't seen this group of guys in well over 10 years, and even though they all live near each other most of them haven't seen each other in a year or two. After dinner I was pretty much ready for bed, but Kelly had just arrived and we walked to another bar. We only stayed there for one beer, and then went to a bar that was a sports bar during the day, but turned into a dance club at night. I reluctantly drank a few more beers and Bobby and I left. Bobby doesn't live too far from my sister's house so he gave me a ride home.

As I'm sitting here thinking about this night, there are thousands of stories I'd love to share. Most wouldn't be funny to outsiders, some would, all would be embarrassing, and due to bro code I can't share any. I can't help but think though how much all these guys meant and mean to me. From Junior High to College we spent so much time together they are all like a second family to me. I'm grateful to have such great friends and feel bad for people that didn't get to have the experiences I had growing up.

How is it possible we haven't seen each other in years? We're all busy I know. All of us married. Most with kids or having kids. Our wives have the requisite Home Depot and Bed Bath & Beyond trips planned every weekend. The headaches hurt too bad. All the guys have great families, kids, houses and lives.

Unfortunately, there will be more time and distance. But there will also be a next time, and for that I can't wait.

Mike "Lenz" Lenzi